amber rahim

Chronic illness: the parts we don't talk about

Leave a comment

Dusting off my soul, again

It’s been an art day today.

I saw this article about thanksgiving through art and laughed.

The Mondrian styled plate caught my eye and reminded me of the unappreciated benefit of art: it’s good for your soul.


It also reminded me about one of my posts in way back in February Dusting off my soul. There is just something about art that lifts us out of the compactness of our lives and into a bigger space.

This afternoon I tried to make a van Gogh today: a starry night on MiniSteck. S was “helping”. Now that is a trial in patience. It was beautiful.

In case you’re wondering what Ministeck is here’s a pic.


Leave a comment

How can pink donuts be my downfall?

I have written a lot about how I have dealt with never ending sickness extreme eating problems (i.e. nil by mouth for 5 years).

I think I have written about it with patience, become a little bit wiser through the process.

Well, today I do not feel even remotely wise or patient. Today sucks.

You see, little sisters copy big sisters. In everything. All those quirky eating/non eating habits that I was able to deal with in F, who has the illness and the multitude of reasons why she does that weird stuff, well, they just suck when S does them.

Take donuts. Until recently, F didn’t eat any kind of bread or bread stuff. Yet she was interested in the little sprinkles on pink sprinked donuts.  So what did she do? Pick off the sprinkles.

S loves bread. I mean really loves it (except crusts but hey, she’s a kid). How does she eat donuts? She picks of the sprinkles (and icing because she’s a sugar junky).

Now I don’t want to force either of my kids to eat junky donuts, I really don’t. But I want to shout “just eat the effing donut!”  Sometimes I feel trapped in this circle of weirdness with food and only one of them has the illness!

Can’t catch a break. You’d think it would be easier with the “healthy one”.


Ok, whingeing session over.


Leave a comment

Dutched up: Rocking the clogs expat style

Earlier this year I started hanging out with other bloggers on Facebook. It was great to be among other writers, hear their stories and be on this writing journey with them.

Then one day Olga asked if anyone else wanted to contribute a story about living in The Netherlands to their anthology. Never thinking that my story would be accepted, let alone published, I said yes.

So, after a great amount of work by Lynn and Olga in collecting our stories and editing, our book is finished. 27 bloggers contributed and I am one of them. I am so proud of us all for saying yes and making this happen. Thank you NL women bloggers.

I write about chronic illness so my story is related to the Dutch healthcare system. We have stories covering all parts of life as a foreigner here in Dutchland. It’s funny, it’s sweet. It’s all so true. If you have every lived here, know Dutch people or visited, there is something here for you. Please check it out.

Check it out on here

for use this link

for itunes click here

book cover

Leave a comment

Life hack for Nausea

This life hack for nausea is not a list of things that will make nausea go away. If you have Bartters Syndrome, hyperemesis or have had chemo, you’ll probably feel nauseous whatever you do. This is a tip on how to still leave your house and relax, despite knowing that at some point you are going to hurl. It’s going to get a little gross but I know you can handle it.

Nausea can last a long time. F vomited everyday for 5 years. There was no way we were going to stay at home for 5 years and never go out. At the beginning we didn’t even know if there would ever be an end to it. We had to find a way to live normal lives, taking into account that our little girl was going to hurl at some point.

So we came up with this kit:

  • small bucket or container
  • Small bags. Sandwich bags are good, as are smelly nappy bags
  • dry tissues
  • wet wipes
  • Bottle of water

Vomiting is gross so the wet wipes are going to be handy to clean stuff up. Why both kinds of tissue? Because sometimes a cold wet wipe will make you heave and you’ll want something dry.

Why the bucket? The one thing worse than the smell of vomit is the feel of it inside a bag. So put the bag in the container and be sick in the container. This works really well for kids too; it’s much easier for them to hold and aim into than a paperbag. Once you or your kid is done, just tie up the bag. Bonus! The smell is contained until you can find a bin (really handy for when you are in the car).

What if you get caught out? You are actually feeling good for a change and you think you are past this highly effective exercise for ripped abs. Then something happens and nausea hits you. You don’t have your kit with you. What do you do?

We have taught F to look for a drain or some patch of grass. Your puke will disappear more quickly and be less visible. Never go for tarmac, paving or any other solid, hard surface. Why? One word: splashback.

So this is my advice based on years of experience. My little girl has bitchin abs from hurling and I have a gold medal in catching projectile vomit. We know what we are talking about.

Lana, this post is inspired by you. I hate that you need chemo but I’m glad that my weird bits of knowledge might be able to help you.